


Learning to be Human

by casstarkk



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anxiety Attacks, Anxious Cas, Human Castiel, M/M, Nightmares
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-21
Updated: 2019-05-21
Packaged: 2020-03-09 00:18:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18905614
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/casstarkk/pseuds/casstarkk
Summary: Cas experiences an anxiety attack and Dean helps him through it.





	Learning to be Human

Cas was convinced he’d never adapt to his new human body. The constant hunger and need to urinate was rather irritating. But most of all, it was the overwhelming emotions that got the best of him. He found himself awake at night, anxious thoughts surging through his mind. He worried about Dean mostly.

He had terrifying nightmares, watching the light fade from Dean’s eyes in his own arms. One night it got so bad, Cas began screaming his name in his sleep. “Dean! Dean!” He tossed and turned as the screams got louder. 

Dean came bursting through the door and rushed to Cas’s side. “Cas? Cas, wake up!” He grabbed his shoulders, and attempted to shake him awake. He continued to scream. “Cas, it’s me!” His eyes shot open as tears streamed down his cheeks. “Dean? Is that you?” 

“Yes, Cas. It’s me. Everything’s okay.” But Cas did not okay. The unsettling feeling was still present in his stomach, eating him away. Dean noticed the concerned look on his face. “Hey, what’s wrong? It was just a nightmare, Cas. It’s over. I’m okay.”

“I don’t feel so good. My...my chest.” Cas clenched his heart as his breathing became rapid. He curled up in a ball, feeling the walls closing in on him. Dean grabbed his trembling hands, holding on like his life depended on it. Cas began hyperventilating, unable to steady his breath. 

“Cas, look at me. You need to breathe, okay? You’re gonna pass out if you don’t. Just take some deep slow breaths, in and out.” Cas shook his head, avoiding eye contact. He continued to rock back and forth, overrun with terror. “I...can’t...breathe,” he choked out through his sobs. 

“Cas!” Dean grabbed his face, forcing Cas to look him in the eye. “Breathe,” he said softly. Dean’s familiar green eyes brought some peace to poor fallen angel. He squeezed Dean’s hand and began slowing his breaths. 

In and out. 

In and out. 

In and out. 

Once his anxiety began to ease, his exhausted body collapsed into Dean’s arms. He continued to cry, soaking Dean’s shirt with tears. “What was that?” Dean rested his chin on Cas’s head, gently rubbing his back. “That’s called an anxiety attack. It can happen when you’re really stressed out or overwhelmed.” 

“I didn’t like that. I thought I was dying.” His nails dug into Dean’s back, never wanting to let go. “I know, Cas. But it’s over now, okay? You’re safe with me.” 

“But what if it happens again?” 

“Then I’ll be there. I’ll always be there.” Cas pulled away from Dean’s arms, wiping the tears from his face. “Dean...will you stay with me?” He spoke shyly, afraid of Dean’s reaction. He had already caused enough trouble in his life as it is. 

“Of course,” Dean smiled and laid himself down next to Cas. “Here, lay your head down on my chest. Listening to my heartbeat may help with the anxiety.” Cas did as he was told and rested his head on Dean’s chest. “Goodnight, Dean.”

“Goodnight, Cas.”

Cas slept better that night than he had in months.


End file.
